Performance Reviews in a Marriage?

Evaluate Yourself as a Spouse and as a Parent : Would you hire you for a spouse and for a parent?

You are a success in business, but are you a success as a spouse and as a parent? What if you looked at your marriage as a business? What if you looked at your family and your parenting as a business? Would you hire you as a spouse and as a parent? How would you come out of a performance evaluation for spousal and family projects?

Maybe exploring these questions will give you an opportunity to do a self-examination as a spouse and as a parent. The results may surprise you. This Wall Street Journal article discussed marriage performance evaluations.

The suggestions from “How Barbara Corcoran Spots the Right People to Hire” offer test questions for a relationship self-examination.

  • As a spouse and as a parent are you a happy person? Do you like yourself? Happy people make others happy.
  • As a spouse and as a parent do you have high energy? Do you move to a beat that moves you and others forward? Low energy people drain the batteries of those around them.
  • As a spouse and as a parent are you smart? Are you smart in a practical way? Do you solve
    problems and move on? Discussing a dilemma only drains energy. Do you go ahead and try to fix the problem?
  • As a spouse and as a parent are you a good communicator? Your significant other and your children need clear communication from you. The life blood of your relationships is communication. Without good communication your world slowly decays and comes apart.
  • As a spouse and as a parent do you like to help others? Helping others binds connections that hold relationships together.

If you were your own boss and had to do your own performance evaluation of your spousal and family projects, how would you evaluate yourself? Maybe exploring this question will give you an opportunity to do a self-examination of you as a spouse and you as a parent. The results may surprise you.

The suggestions from “What if you could replace performance evaluations with four simple questions?” offer test questions for a relationship self-examination.

  • Given what you know about your performance as a spouse and a parent, and if it were your money, would you award yourself the highest possible compensation increase and bonus. Answer on a five-point scale from “strongly agree,” a 5, to “strongly disagree,” a 1.
  • Given what you know about your own performance as a spouse and as a parent, would you always want you on your team as a spouse and as a family member. Answer on a five-point scale from “strongly agree,” a 5, to “strongly disagree,” a 1.
  • You as a spouse and as a parent are at risk for low performance. Answer yes or no.
  • You as a spouse and as a parent are ready for a promotion today. Answer yes or no.

If you might decide not to hire yourself as a spouse and as a parent, if you would not give yourself a high performance evaluation as a spouse and as a parent, maybe it is time to take stock of your behavior and its affects on your spouse and on your family. This is when a professional counselor can guide you through a self-examination process that may change your life. Are you ready to move forward? Are you ready to hire yourself? Are you ready to give yourself the highest performance evaluation?

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